is that even a word? really? i feel as confused as it sounds. we went to go see eagle eye the other day. great movie by the way! it comes at a perfect time. the 25th anniversary of wargames. but i digress...
sometimes i come out of a movie theater and get really turned around. a piece of me gets left behind in that dark theater... my sense of direction. i get so engaged in the movie i forget which path i took to get there. this time it went a little farther. american actors, cold air and the lack of humidity in the room made me think i was home. HOME! that was the term i had floating in my head as the credits rolled thru the screen. the conversation around me snapped me out of my american haze and brought me back to manila. it was then that i realized how i used the term HOME.
in the past, home meant a warm bowl of sinigang, laughter around the table with family and a world full of greenery. now it was a freezing theater and an american accent? i was somewhat surprised by my disorientation. it made me pause.. i guess i have 2 homes. from the colder side of the world i would think of home and sigh at how much i missed it, here i am now in that place wishing i could easily jump back.
dual citizenship has its pros and cons. i can never have both worlds easily. i can never bring all that i love and cherish into one place. i can never be truly home.